My Experiences So Far In NYC

All right, the poem wasn't that good.

New York City was, and is, a blast. In brief, I've been to Central Park, the Museum of Natural History, Little Italy, the Upright Citizen's Brigade Theater, Ground Zero, Radio City Hall, Carnegie Hall, the Rockefeller Center, Times Square, the Statue of Liberty, Wall Street, the Garment District, Hell's Kitchen, the New York Times building, and a massive comics shop in Midtown (named Midtown Comics).

In length:

New York City cabbies are about as ridiculous as everyone says they are. Lanes are treated as mere suggestions, and the horn is indeed a surrogate for the brake pedal in many cases. Cabs miss other cars and people by mere inches. This was while I was in one (we've taken two), and they're even more intimidating outside. But they demonstrate such an unparalleled mastery of their vehicles that it really isn't that terrifying. They may miss me by an inch with their horn blaring all the while, but I still feel completely safe. Which is interesting. Rides with NYC cabbies are like two-dimensional roller coaster rides - you may go all over the place, but you don't feel like you're in any actual danger.

Restaurants in New York City are easily a cut above any other restaurants I've been to anywhere. Not that they're all superior, I've been to some REALLY nice restaurants, but in general, the average in NYC is much better than the average anywhere else. There was this Irish pub style place where we were still walking towards it at 6:00 - and had our meal, after appetizers, at 6:15. And it was delicious. I haven't had a bad meal since I've been here. I'm making a dedicated effort not to go to any place I've ever been to before, rationalizing that it's a waste to fly all the way to the Big Apple and eat at Subway.

The subway is at the same time enormously confusing and enormously useful. I can't help but think of it as described in some 1900s-esque period sci-fi novel where the protagonist, in the far-off year of 2000, sees a marvelous system of trains that go underground, that shuttle millions of people around every day, for a mere pittance. Once, we got lost and ended up in Brooklyn.


Central Park: We both agreed, my father and I, that it would be much more interesting in the spring when everything wasn't all withered and leafless. It was still pretty nice, but, y'know, everything's dead or hibernating. It's still forty degrees out. Not spring yet. There was a playground and a bunch of rocks to climb on, and the whole place was flanked with horses, making it practically impossible to get in for me.

Museum of Natural History: Awesome. Dinosaur skeletons, a planetarium show, a butterfly exhibit where we got to mingle with hundreds of butterflies. It was 80 degrees and 80% humidity inside the butterfly enclosure. People were panting, sweating, complaining, wiping their foreheads, I just shrugged and said that this is my existence for four or five months out of the year.

Little Italy: Practically invisible to us until we found twelve or thirteen Italian restaurants in a two-block diameter. The one we went to was excellent. I actually had manicotti with sauce, and enjoyed it. See? New York City is broadening my horizons. I may yet embrace sauce.

The Upright Citizen's Brigade Theater: An improv theater, a small underground place (literally and figuratively). We went for two hours of the most gut-bustingly hilarious improv I've ever seen, that blows any Whose Line? sketches out of the friggin' water. Well, maybe not Sound Effects.

Ground Zero: Sad. Full of construction. Apparently they're building a new building that'll be some sort of memorial, or maybe a replacement, I wasn't too clear on the details.

Radio City Hall, Carnegie Hall, Rockefeller Center: Were closed. Or unavailable. We stopped outside, oohed and aahed, then left.

Times Square: As big and flashy as I've ever seen it. I tried and failed to pinpoint the exact location where the sailor kissed the nurse in that famous photograph (if you don't know which photograph I'm talking about, get a friggin' clue and look it up, it won a Pulitzer for God's sake). We got to see a fight between two big guys, which the police broke up relatively quickly. My father started counting when the first punch was thrown; the police showed up 32 seconds later. Commendably fast. Giuliani really did make a difference.

The Statue of Liberty: Did you know that the copper exterior of the Statue is only as thick as two coins? Most of it is an iron frame. Anyway, not much to say - it was a statue, it was impressive, the gift shop shilled it for everything it was worth. The ferry ride over and back was fun. Plus, New York's feral seagulls and evil pigeons duked it out for bread crumbs. That was entertainment in and of itself.

Wall Street: I didn't get to see any of the fun parts of Wall Street, you know, with lots of smartly besuited people waving bits of paper and shouting their lungs out. Apparently that's forbidden to the public. I got some good pictures in front of the New York Stock Exchange building, though.

The Garment District: Lives up to its name. Holy crap, are there ever a lot of clothes stores. There was one Macy's that dwarfed any department store I've ever seen. (Maybe Harrod's in England was bigger. I really couldn't say, it's been nigh on a decade.) I didn't end up buying anything, though.

Hell's Kitchen: Did not live up to its name. Wasn't really that terrifying, to be honest. There was a flea market, at which I bought some VHS tapes my father will convert into DVDs for me, since I possess no VHS player.

The New York Times Building: Got a picture in front of it with me rolling my eyes derisively. Stupid New York Times. They charge $5.00 for a Sunday edition that's two-thirds advertisements and wonder why they're losing business.

Midtown Comics: I now have a reason to live in New York City, and that reason is this store.


Overall, I'm loving it, and I'll visit other things like Fifth Avenue and the Empire State Building later in the week. I definitely want to move here after law school. It'll be fun!